


The Choice

by pleasereadmeok



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: F/M, Suspend your disbelief!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-22
Updated: 2017-02-22
Packaged: 2018-09-26 08:28:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9876530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pleasereadmeok/pseuds/pleasereadmeok
Summary: Matthew stared at the tall man tending to his wife, he saw the shiny new wedding ring on her finger and suddenly everything was clear to him.  Matthew’s astonishment was equal to Mary’s, not in his wildest dreams had he considered that she would re-marry.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story came about in such a weird way. There was a post on IMDB putting forward an idea – what if Matthew Crawley had not died and that he just had disappeared because he had amnesia from the car crash! Well that set me thinking and I sketched this story out and promptly dismissed it as ridiculous. Then a couple of months ago I was listening to a play on the radio about a woman whose husband was killed in action during the First World War and she later re-married BUT then her husband turns up – not dead after all. EEK! So I revisited this story and thought about what might happen to Mary and Henry if Matthew turned up alive. Since then I found out that a few others have been working on the same idea. I deliberately haven’t read any of those until this was finished – so I’m hoping this is sufficiently different. You will have to suspend your disbelief. Matthew returns – we don’t know why or how, that’s not really the point, he just does, and this is my take on the scenario.

Matthew Crawley watched as the father and son happily set about their task. The father had raised the small boy onto his shoulders like he had done it a thousand times before and then passed him a colourful poster and some drawing pins. The boy carefully pinned the poster to the tree.  
“Is it straight?”  
He asked his father as he was lowered safely to his feet. The two stood back to appraise their work. The tall man patted the boy on the back,  
“Well done old chap.”  
Happy with result they moved on down the road to another tree. 

Matthew watched the pair stopping and chatting to various passers by. The man seemed an affable type, sharing a joke with people that they met along the way. He stared wistfully after the boy and his father – the boy would probably be about George’s age. He wandered over to the tree to look at the poster, ‘Downton Abbey, Open to the public on Sunday, Teas served on the lawn.’ A sudden realisation dawned and he turned quickly to search for the man and boy – it _was_ George. 

 

“This simply is not good enough Mr Harris!” Mary was firm, “I won’t tolerate it – do you understand me?!”  
The object of her anger was suitably chastened.  
“Yes milady.”  
He grovelled as he backed out of the office.

Mary sat back in her chair and giggled, proud of her confidence in dealing with the awkward man.  
“If only Matthew could see me now!”

A few minutes later there was a knock at the door and Henry entered,  
“Hello you. You’re looking pleased with yourself. I saw Harris scurrying down the path like a scalded cat, poor man!”  
“He deserved it.”  
“Remind me never to cross you!” 

Henry sat on the edge of the desk and pulled Mary’s chair towards him.  
“I’m glad it went well, you’re magnificent in victory!” He took hold of her hand and kissed inside her wrist, “I missed you, why don’t we celebrate?” He leant to kiss the side of her neck, “We could… do some paperwork together…,” he fingered a button on her shirt, “…on the desk?”  
“Henry! Someone might find us.”  
He flashed a smile,  
“We could lock the door and close the curtains. Come on, there’s ages before we need to rescue the children from Nanny.”  
Mary didn’t answer, she just locked the door and closed the curtains.

 

Afterwards they surveyed the debris they had pushed off the desk onto the floor.  
“I’ll help you sort it out.”  
Henry started to pick up the various papers and pens.  
“Thank you.”  
“No _thank you_. It’s the least I can do!” He laughed.  
“Actually I was thanking you for last night.”  
He looked confused. “Well I think I should be thanking you for last night as well!”  
“Henry! No, not that! I meant when I was rattling on about Harris. You asked me some very clever questions and that helped me decide what to do. I’ve noticed you do that a lot. Instead of jumping in to solve the problem for me, you helped me work it out for myself, so thank you.”  
“Darling you were running the estate long before I turned up. Downton is your domain and cars are mine. You don’t need me to solve your problems for you.”  
“Well take it from me, most men try, like Harris.” She raised an eyebrow, “And I suppose it was just by chance that you happened to call in here just after he left?”  
Henry grimaced,  
“Ah. I’ve been found out. I just wanted to see how you got on.”  
“And that is why I love you Henry Talbot.”  
She pecked a kiss on the end of his nose.  
“I love you too Mrs Talbot.”  
“Ahem, _Lady_ Talbot.”  
“Mmm. How could I forget? Well milady, I think we missed a bit of paperwork.” 

 

Later Mary and Henry walked hand in hand back to the house to collect George and baby William from the nursery. Tom and Sybie joined them all for a picnic tea on the lawn. When they had eaten, the men played croquet with the children while Mary fed William. Henry returned to his wife’s side to lift the happy gurgling bundle onto his shoulder to pat his back and was rewarded with a loud burp from the baby that made the other children laugh. 

George and Sybie decided it would be a good game to roll down a grass bank.  
“Be careful now!” Tom shouted as he sat down to drink his tea. “How do they have so much energy?”  
After precisely five minutes of peace from the children, George was shouting,  
“Uncle Henry, Uncle Tom! Come and play horses!”  
The men ran around with the children on their backs, jumping and making horsey noises. 

Later when nanny collected the children for their bath, Mary, Tom and Henry enjoyed the peace and quiet for a while.  
“I was wondering what you two would think about getting the children a pony, something small like a Shetland?” Henry asked.  
“That’s a grand idea, it will get them used to riding,” Tom agreed, “and it would save our poor backs!”  
Mary smiled, “George would love that.”  
“I’ll sort it out then. I wanted to check first, well because… I don’t want to overstep the mark.” He looked at his wife for reassurance, “It’s just that sometimes I forget that he’s not my son.”  
“Thank you for thinking of ways to make George happy. He adores you and I do too.” Mary placed a kiss on his lips.  
“Mmm. Well that’s good news because I adore you too. I don’t suppose there is anymore paperwork you need me to help you with?”  
“What paperwork is that? Can I help?” Tom enquired.

 

Barrow entered the library looking distinctly uncomfortable. A few months ago he would have relished his task, knowing the havoc he was about to unleash on the Crawley family, but now he was the picture of misery. He cleared his throat and choked out the announcement of the visitor.  
“Mr. Matthew Crawley.”


	2. Chapter 2

 

Every face turned towards the unhappy butler with confusion and disbelief. Henry looked on in horror as he took in the stranger who followed Thomas – a man who was the very image of George. As soon as he comprehended the gravity of the situation his eyes sought out Mary’s. Time seemed to slow down as he watched her changing expression run through the full range of emotions – shock; realisation; elation; panic. Her hand covered her mouth as she murmured,  
“Matthew.” 

Mary turned to Henry and he saw the colour drain from her face. It was clear she was going to faint.  
“Matthew,”  
She mumbled as she fell. Henry rushed to catch her before she hit the floor.  
“Darling I’ve got you.”  
He carefully placed her on the sofa and soon all eyes turned from Matthew to Mary. The awful implications of the situation left them numb and open mouthed. 

Matthew stared at the tall man tending to his wife, he saw the shiny new wedding ring on her finger and suddenly everything was clear to him. Matthew’s astonishment was equal to Mary’s, not in his wildest dreams had he considered that she would re-marry.  
_“Oh god – I shouldn’t have come back.”_

Robert was the first to speak.  
“Matthew! Oh my dear boy! You have come back to us but as you see… this is a shock for us all.”  
“Yes of course. I… I should have written or something, but I couldn’t wait to see…”  
Cora stepped in and took control.  
“Matthew have you seen your mother yet?”  
He snapped back into the present,  
“No I… I came here first. I wanted to see…” _“Mary.”_  
But was that his Mary? She looked so different. The fresh bloom of youth had gone but there was something more that was different, something he couldn’t define.

Mary recovered a little and whispered to Henry,  
“Would you take me upstairs? I need to lie down before I faint again.”  
“But darling surely you need to talk with Matthew?”  
“Not yet. I can’t. Not yet.”  
Matthew watched as the new husband lifted his wife from the sofa and carried her away.

Henry lowered Mary gently onto the bed in their room. _Their room_ … suddenly he felt that he did not belong there. This was not his room and this was not his wife. Mary stirred.  
“Darling, it’s alright, you’ve had such a shock.”  
“I’ve been dreaming. I must have been dreaming! Matthew?”  
“Yes he’s here.”  
“No!” she said firmly and loudly, “It was a dream. Henry…”  
“Mary this has to be faced. We need to…,” he ran his hand through his hair and shook his head, “Actually I have no idea what we need to do!”

“Make love with me.”  
“What? Um… I don’t think…Mary we shouldn’t … I mustn’t.”  
“Please, I need you now more than ever.” She wailed.  
“Darling please don’t cry. I can’t bear to see you cry.”  
Henry rushed to hold her and kiss away her tears. Mary’s mouth found his and he did not resist – he could not resist.  
“Please Henry!”  
They clung to each other as they made love, desperately needing the intimacy to block out the rest of the world.

Afterwards Henry was consumed with guilt.  
_“Should I even be here?”_  
He held Mary in his arms and in time she fell asleep. He thought about what to do next. If Mary divorced Matthew they could marry ‘officially’. Surely it could be done quickly and quietly? But then a sudden thought made his blood run cold – he was assuming too much. Mary was in love with Matthew once and that love was cruelly taken from her, maybe she would choose to be with him again? He remembered how Mary had reacted to Matthew’s arrival, in amongst the other emotions he saw on her face one stood out – _elation._

What should he do? How should he act? Henry’s natural inclination was to fight to keep his wife but if she truly wanted to be with Matthew would he really stand in her way? He loved her enough to want her to be happy, but if that was without him, could he let her go? He came to the hardest decision of his life. He had to give Mary the time and space to come to her own conclusion as he always did. If he insisted or forced her hand, they might both regret it for the rest of their lives. 

When Mary woke she saw Henry was dressed and sitting on the edge of the bed.  
“Darling I need to say something very important. Mary you are the love of my life and all I want to do is hold onto you and never let go. But Matthew is alive and we have to face the fact that you are still his wife - we’re not legally married. Most important of all, you have to decide who you want to spend the rest of your life with and you can’t think about that properly if I stay”.  
“No.”  
She grabbed his hand and held it tight.  
“I… I think I need to give you some time so you can work things out with Matthew. You need time to decide what you really want.”  
“Please don’t go.”  
“I must. It’s for the best.”

Henry intended to leave quickly before he lost his composure completely but couldn’t stop himself asking a question, even though he feared the answer.  
“Do you still love him?”  
Mary stroked Henry’s cheek.  
“Yes I’ll always love him. I’m so sorry. I buried my love for him somewhere deep and dark that I couldn’t reach and now…”  
“And now?”  
“And now everything is coming back to me.”  
“The love is coming back?”  
“Yes.”  
It was then that Henry realised he might lose her forever and his heart broke.  
“Then I promise I won’t stand in your way.”  
He choked out as he rushed from the room. As Henry shut the door to his dressing room Mary sobbed into her pillow,  
“But I love you too”.


	3. Chapter 3

Henry collected some essentials from his dressing room and hurried down the stairs. Robert and Cora’s faces were etched with worry as they caught sight of him through the open door of the drawing room where they sat talking with Matthew and Tom. When they saw Henry descending the stairs with a suitcase they tried to reason with him.  
“Henry you can’t go like this…”  
“Henry dear we must …”  
“I have to let her think. I’m sorry I can’t stay.” 

Matthew caught up with him as he reached his car.  
“Henry? It is Henry isn’t it?”  
Their natural politeness told them that a handshake was in order, yet neither could bring themselves to do it.  
“Matthew.”  
Tom joined the two men, sensing they might need a meditator.  
“Henry, come back into the house and we can talk.”  
Henry shrugged,  
“Tom there’s nothing to talk about. Mary has to decide what she wants.”  
Matthew was conciliatory,  
“I genuinely had no idea Mary had married again. I can’t imagine what you are going through.”  
“How could anybody imagine this? A few hours ago I had a wonderful wife and children and now my life will never be the same again.”  
“I’m so sorry.”

A thought struck Henry like a dagger in his heart,  
“George… oh god. He’s only ever known me as his…”  
“Does he think you are his father?”  
“No, we didn’t think that was right. He calls me Uncle Henry and we, Mary and I, have always talked about you so he understands that you are his father but I love him like my own.”  
“‘Children’, you said?”  
“Yes, we have another son, William. He’s four months old.”  
“Oh god this is such a mess.”

For Henry the thought of losing Mary and George, and maybe William as well, was overwhelming. Tom saw his pain and placed a friendly hand on his shoulder.  
“I’m sorry I have to go.”  
He threw his bag into the back of the car and jumped into the drivers seat like he always did. Tom shouted above the noise of the engine,  
“Henry whatever happens, I’m your friend as well and I care about you both. Telephone me tomorrow and we’ll meet up.”  
Henry shook his head and drove away as quickly as he could.

“God I need a drink.” Matthew sighed.  
“I think we both need one.” Tom agreed.  
They re-convened in the library, Tom indicating to Robert and Cora that they should be left alone to talk.  
“Matthew I’ve just said to Henry that I’m his friend and I’ll do everything I can to help but the same goes for you too.”  
“You can help me by telling me about Mary.”  
“You have to understand that Mary has changed because … well to be frank… because you ‘died’. She grieved for a year, she didn’t come out of her room and gradually she fought her way back. Now she’s happy, confident and capable. She even runs the estate, she’s in charge.”  
“Really? What about you? I thought that was your job.”  
“It’s a long story but I’m in business with Henry. We own a car company and we’re just about to go into production with our first sports car. Everything is different now.”

“What about George? Does he like Henry?”  
“Matthew, he loves him. Henry has treated him like his own son. He’s the one who reads his bedtime stories. He’s sat by him when he was ill, taught him how to fish and ride - everything that you would have taught him. He’s a good man Matthew. He’s the type of man you would be friends with if circumstances were different.”

 

Henry checked into the Grand Hotel in York and asked for a bottle of brandy to be brought to his room. He had never been apart from Mary since they were married and it was strange to be alone in a bedroom without her.  
“I suppose I’ll just have to get used to this.”  
He could never understand why his friends all spent time at the club to ‘get away’ from their wives and be in the company of men. Henry had always loved being at home with Mary and the children. He needed them to feel whole. 

He lit a cigarette and watched the smoke spiral up to the ceiling as his mind wandered. Henry remembered a time, before they were married, that he had sat quietly beside Mary as she talked about Matthew. He had watched as she relived the pain of his death. All he had wanted to do then, and since, was to take the pain away for her. But the look on Mary’s face when she first saw Matthew again haunted him - the all-consuming joy of recovering a love once lost. It was that look that convinced him that his ‘marriage’ to Mary would soon be over. Just a few hours ago he had everything he ever wanted – a loving wife, two children and a family, and now he was losing them. 

His desolation was interrupted when the hotel porter knocked on the door.  
“Your brandy sir. Will that be all?”  
Henry poured himself a large glass of brandy, for there was no hope of sleep without it. At least it would give him relief from this awful night for a few hours. He needed to feel Mary’s skin against his to be able to sleep. The way she fitted so perfectly in his arms and against his body was the last thing he was conscious of each night and now all that was gone.

Henry tossed and turned in the night. At one point he reached for Mary and found her soft cool skin. There was the caress of fingers and kisses and he felt her naked body against his. He didn’t dare to open his eyes – if he did his dream would end. Soon her skin was wet from exertion and soft moans filled the room. With the sigh of her name he woke up. He opened his eyes. Had he been dreaming? Her perfume seemed to linger in the room. As the cold realisation dawned, the wretchedness of his situation engulfed him. He hugged the pillow and sighed,  
“Mary.”


	4. Chapter 4

Henry telephoned Tom in the morning.  
“How is she?”  
“I wish I could tell you, I haven’t seen her since last night.”  
“Is she with Matthew?”  
“No. We thought it was best that Matthew would stay with Isobel. Mary hasn’t come out of her room and she won’t talk to anyone. How are you?”  
“Honestly I feel like I have been cast adrift with no anchor.”  
“God Henry I can’t believe this is happening. I’m overjoyed Matthew is alive of course but the implications. God. Have you thought about what you are going to do?”  
“What does one do when their wife’s husband comes back from the dead?!”  
“Fight for her?”  
“I can’t. It has to be her decision.”  
“Has she given you any hope?”  
“She told me last night that she still loves him so I think I have to prepare for the worst. I love her enough to let her go if she decides that is what she wants. I just feel so helpless; I have no rights; I’m just the spare part. Anyway, enough of that, did you see Laura this morning? Tell me what she said.”  
“You want to talk about that even now?”  
“Especially now. I need some happy news.”  
“She said ‘yes’!” 

 

Henry called at Isobel’s later that morning. Although she was delighted to have her son restored to her, she was not insensitive to Henry’s situation and so she greeted him warmly with a hug.  
“Oh my dear man. How are you?”  
“I’m…”, he decided not to say, “What about you? You must be so happy to have Matthew back. Tom told me he was here and I wondered if I might see him for a moment?”  
Isobel looked worried,  
“Please don’t be concerned, I just want to talk to him.”

 

“I want you to know that I’m not going to try to influence Mary’s decision. Look Matthew, I was a racing driver and I’m still a racer at heart. Every fibre of my being wants to fight for her but I can’t do that. I can’t make things worse for her. I love her so much that if she decides she wants to be with you I won’t make trouble.”  
“That’s decent of you.”  
“I’m a decent man.”  
“I know that. Tom has told me all about you and how you have loved George, I’m so grateful.”  
“I’m sure you would have done the same if…”  
The sentence caught in his throat. Would Matthew be bringing up his child now? His William?  
“I’ll endeavour to follow your example. I will need to see Mary to discuss the situation but I won’t try to force the issue. You have my word.”  
Matthew offered his hand to Henry and this time it was accepted.  
“Thank you.”

 

“Matthew? So it really is you?”  
Mary stared in disbelief at her erstwhile husband.  
“Yes. Mary I’m sorry it took me so long to come home. You must believe me I didn’t even know that I had a home.”  
“I don’t understand.”  
“I injured my head and couldn’t remember anything much apart from my first name.”  
“But where have you been?”  
“I wandered for years. I just did odd jobs for food and then I found myself in France. I’ve been living on a farm.”  
“So what … um ... what changed? Why have you come back now?”  
“Something happened a few days ago and suddenly my memory started coming back. I remembered … I remembered you and knew I had to come home. I didn’t even consider that you would re-marry! Maybe it would have been better if I’d stayed away?”  
“No! Matthew. You’re alive and I’m happy to see you.”  
“You don’t seem that happy.”  
“What did you think would happen Matthew – that everything would be the same? That I’d fall into your arms and we’d live happily ever after? You died and I wanted to die too. I grieved for you. I met other men and I nearly married them but nothing felt right. I met Henry and I fell in love again. I went to your grave to say goodbye and told you I would always love you, and I do, but Henry… Henry is …”  
Mary couldn’t finish her sentence. How could she tell her beloved Matthew about the man who had replaced him. She bit her lip and stayed silent.  
“Honestly I didn’t know what to expect when I came back. I didn’t think things through properly, I just knew that I had to see you. Oh god what a mess.”

 

Henry had just turned the corner into the garden on his way to see the children when he was stopped in his tracks by the sight of Matthew in the midst of a heated discussion with a beautiful woman. He felt like a worm as he hung back and eavesdropped on the end of the conversation. 

“Sylvie you shouldn’t have come here!”  
“But you just left me Mathieu! What was I supposed to do?”  
“This is my home. I had to come back.”  
“When you left I didn’t know what to think. One minute you were playing with Louis in the garden and the next you had gone!”  
“I’m sorry.”  
“All I had left were a few scribbled notes – ‘Downton/Crawley’”  
“Sylvie I wasn’t thinking straight. I’ve behaved so badly. I owe you an explanation.”  
“Oui! Exactement!”  
“Louis and I were digging for worms in the garden to take fishing and we found a centipede. I was telling him how in England we called them ‘creepy crawlies’. I suddenly remembered one of the boys at school calling me ‘Creepy Crawley’ and everything came flooding back. I was noting down the things I could remember and then it came to me – Downton and… Mary.”  
“Your wife!”  
“Yes, how did you find out?”  
“I asked some women in the village about the Open Day and about the family. People are very willing to gossip to strangers.”  
“Don’t you see? I had to come back, to see her, but leaving without explaining was unforgiveable. I was so completely overwhelmed by my desire to come home. I’m ashamed that I didn’t give you and Louis a second thought.”  
Sylvie started to cry,  
“And what now? Are you staying here?”  
“I have to, it’s my inheritance and I have responsibilities, I have a son.”  
“And your wife?”  
“She’s remarried – it’s an unholy mess.”  
“Do you still love her?”  
“Yes. But Sylvie …”  
He tried to take her hand but she snatched it back and turned to run from him.  
“Mathieu I thought we were happy. We were going to be married… I hate you!”

Matthew was about to chase after Sylvie when he bumped into Henry. The two men stared at each other in disbelief and confusion.  
“I suppose you heard all that? Will you tell Mary?”  
Matthew asked when he regained his composure.  
“I can’t keep secrets from my wife”  
“But she’s not your wife is she?”  
The look of pure misery on Henry’s face was obvious to Matthew.  
“I apologise, that was unfair.”  
Henry just shook his head and walked away.


	5. Chapter 5

George hid behind Mary’s skirt.  
“I want to go and play with Uncle Henry. Where’s Uncle Henry?”  
“Henry is at work George but we have a very special visitor. Georgie this is your Papa. Won’t you say hello to him?”  
Matthew bent down to introduce himself,  
“Hello George.”  
“Hello.”  
A small face appeared from behind his mother and promptly disappeared again.

George knew that this was important because Mamma was being so serious, but he was still frightened of the stranger. All he wanted was for the man to go away. He craved the familiarity of the men he knew well, Uncle Tom was always fun, and Donk, and Mr. Barrow. Uncle Henry who carried him on his shoulders and played with him was his papa - he didn’t need another one.  
“May we go and see Uncle Henry and Uncle Tom at work? I want to drive the cars.”  
“But George.”  
“Please Mamma!”  
Mary saw George was about to burst into tears and so she acquiesced,  
“Yes of course.”  
George skipped off to the car as Mary shrugged in defeat,  
“Sorry Matthew. He loves to sit in the cars and pretend to drive. I’m sure he will get used to you in time.” 

 

Mary hesitated before she picked up the telephone but she didn’t know what else to do. She telephoned Henry at the showroom. It was going to be an awkward conversation because they hadn’t spoken since he had left the house two days before. She explained the situation.

“I just don’t know what to do, George wont go near Matthew.”  
“Can I help?”  
“I couldn’t ask you to do that.”  
“You can ask me anything. You know I would do anything for you.”  
“Henry…I… I know I have no right to ask, but could we come?”  
“You don’t need to ask, bring the children and Matthew too. Oh and some of Mrs Patmore’s cake might help.”  
Mary couldn’t help laughing,  
“Is that for George or for you?!”  
Henry had to admit,  
“Well I do miss her cooking!”

Henry immediately regretted his invitation. How could he be in the same room as Mary and not touch her, not kiss her. But how could he? Her husband, who she still loved, would be there. And then there was the secret he held about the woman he had seen Matthew with. How could he look Mary in the eyes and not tell her the truth?

 

George bounced into the showroom of Talbot and Branson and ran to Henry.  
“Uncle Henry! Uncle Henry!”  
Henry picked him up and swung him round like he always did.  
“Hello old chap.”  
He kissed the top of his head as George whispered conspiratorially to Henry, “Mamma says that man is my papa but I don’t believe her. My papa is dead.”  
“George this is a wonderful thing that has happened. We all thought that your father was dead but here he is. Isn’t that miraculous?”  
George ignored his Uncle’s encouragement.  
“May I drive the cars Uncle Henry?”  
“Yes of course you can. Why don’t you show your Papa how well you can drive?”  
“Alright.”  
George ran of to carefully explain the parts of the car and how to drive to Matthew, just like Uncle Henry and Uncle Tom had taught him.

“How are you?” Henry asked Mary as she carefully placed William in his welcoming arms. “Hello little one.”  
“I think I should be asking you that question.”  
“I miss you.”  
“I miss you too.” She said as she gazed into his eyes. Henry had carefully avoided making eye contact for fear that he might drown but now he was drawn to look, trying to understand what Mary was saying. _“She misses me. Maybe there is hope after all?”_  
“But you must be so glad to have Matthew back.” He searched her eyes for the truth. “You said that you still love him.”  
“I do love him, but I love you too. It’s an impossible situation.”  
Henry’s heart leapt, _“She still loves me”._

Matthew was trying to concentrate on what his son was telling him but he couldn’t help being distracted by watching Mary with Henry. He had seen Mary’s face light up when she had first caught sight of Henry when they entered the showroom. George had been overjoyed to see him as well. It was clear that they were a family. Did he really have the right to change that? Just his mere presence was destroying a once happy family.

George returned to Henry’s side.  
“Uncle Henry when are you coming home? I miss you.”  
He picked up George to hug him. Matthew recognised the anguish in Henry’s face and the emotion in his words as he held the boy,  
“I miss you too. I love you George… if,” he stuttered, “…if you ever need me, I’ll be here.” 

When Mary made ready to go home Matthew asked,  
“Mary would you be alright getting back to Downton on your own? I’d like to stay and talk to Henry.”  
“I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”  
She shot a look at Henry, who gave her a reassuring smile,  
“It’ll be fine, I promise.”

Henry led Matthew into the office.  
“Drink?”  
“God yes!”  
“Whisky?”  
The two men sat in silence for a few minutes as they sipped their drinks until Matthew cleared his throat.  
“I wanted to thank you for not telling Mary about Sylvie. I promise you that I intend to tell her myself. There just hasn’t been time.”  
“Be sure that you do. I can’t promise to stay quiet.”  
“It’s not what you think you know.”  
“Well then maybe you ought to tell me the whole story?”

Matthew told Henry the tale of how he done some odd jobs for the young widow and her son when he was travelling around France, and how he had stayed.  
“She seemed to think that you were going to marry her.”  
“I was, and then… well, this happened.”  
“Do you love her? She certainly seems to love you.”  
“Yes. But I … I’m married to Mary.”  
Henry started to laugh. He couldn’t help himself. The situation they all found themselves in was so completely ridiculous.  
“I don’t think there is anything to laugh about Henry!”  
“Don’t you? Believe me Matthew, it’s better than the alternative!”  
Matthew gulped his whisky to suppress his own smile.


	6. Chapter 6

Tom was sent off to investigate when Matthew had not returned to his mother’s by the evening. The family feared that the men had quarrelled or worst still, killed each other! He found them in the office fast asleep. Henry was slumped in his chair with his feet up on the desk and Matthew was perched on the chaise longue they reserved for favoured customers and was in danger of falling forward onto his face.  
“Just as I thought.”  
He picked up the telephone to reassure the family that everything was well.

 

In the car on the way home to Downton, Matthew was quiet.  
“Do you want to talk about it?” Tom asked gently, “We don’t have to go home immediately.”  
“You were right about Henry. In another life we could have been friends.”  
“I know you could be.”  
“How were George and Mary when they got back?”  
“George went off to bed like a lamb. He was so excited about showing you the cars and seeing Henry.”  
“And Mary?”  
“Mary is in pieces. It’s like she is in grief again. We had a talk when she got home and she is torn in two. She loves you and feels she owes you loyalty as your wife and George’s father but she loves Henry too. You need to have a proper talk with her. This can’t go on – I fear for her sanity.” Tom was quiet for a while until he seemed to come to a decision. “Matthew I’m your friend and I know I promised I wouldn’t interfere but I’ll just say this. I’ve watched how Mary has grown and changed in the last five years. Forgive me but I honestly believe that Henry suits the way she is now. The Mary you knew died when you did.”  
“Tom could you take me back to Downton instead of mother’s?”

 

As Matthew entered the Great Hall he caught sight of Mary’s anxious face as she asked Tom,  
“Is Henry alright?”  
Matthew thought of the time he had kissed Mary on the exact spot where she stood now. But that Mary had gone. The Mary he had loved so passionately was gone but this new Mary could be his friend; Henry could be his friend.  
“Mary. We need to talk.”  
“Yes. We do. But I need to talk to Henry first.”

 

Back in the office of Talbot and Branson Henry was trying to sober up. He made some strong coffee and flopped onto the chaise. He smoothed his hand over the dark green velvet and remembered when Mary had insisted he and Tom bought it for the office.  
“You can’t expect customers to sit in that awful hard chair. You want them to feel comfortable and pampered and then they’ll buy from you.”  
Of course Henry realised later that his wife had other things in mind for that chaise. He stroked the velvet and tortured himself with the memory of making love with Mary on that very spot. He smiled as he recalled her storming into the office a few weeks after William was born,  
“Henry Talbot if you don’t make love with me this minute I will divorce you!”  
She had misunderstood his respectful patience after William arrived and was convinced that he no longer found her attractive now he had his son. He had learned from that misunderstanding that being open and honest was the only way to keep his marriage on a steady course. 

Henry considered that the happiness of four people and their children depended on everyone being honest now. The way Matthew talked about the French woman and her son made Henry wonder if he had returned out of loyalty to Mary when in fact he wanted a new life with Sylvie. But then what would that mean for himself and Mary? If Matthew wished to be free to marry Sylvie and Mary stayed with Henry – would he always be second best? Would Mary even want to be with him anyway? That ‘look’ she had given Matthew when he returned – she had never looked at Henry like that. He thought through the possible outcomes but concluded that all of them were bad for him. His head started to ache.  
“Bloody hell!” 

 

The smell of cigarettes and whisky greeted Mary as she entered the showroom office. Henry was naturally tidy and organised but the room was littered with piles of papers and full ashtrays but there was no sign of the man himself.

“Henry, are you here?”  
Henry appeared from the bathroom wiping shaving cream off his face with a towel.  
“Mary!”  
Normally Henry would have been delighted to see his wife and rushed to hug and kiss her. Today, he gulped down a deep breath and braced himself for the worst. 

“Henry have you been sleeping here?”  
“Um – well, I have a room at The Grand but sometimes I lose track of time…”  
She saw the empty whisky bottle and understood. He made an effort to hide his anxiety and tidied up a little, “… Here let me move these files. There’s always a surprising amount of paperwork that has to be done.”  
Paper fluttered onto the floor. He bit his lip and dared to look at Mary as they both remembered. He shrugged and then busied himself with tidying the piles of papers onto the desk.  
“Here you can sit down now.”  
Henry decided to sit on the edge of the desk rather than next to Mary and he steeled himself for what he surely had to face.

“Henry I’m so sorry I shut you out. I needed to think, to be sure for George’s sake. Matthew is his father, that has to be considered…”  
Henry cracked. He’d stayed silent for days now he had to say something, anything.  
“But what about William? I’m William’s father - you need to consider that as well!”  
“Henry but that’s what I need to …”  
“Mary please don’t do this. I love you and the children – I can’t imagine being able to live without you all. Matthew is a stranger to you both now – has he even told you where has he been? I’m sorry … I like Matthew, I do, but what the hell has he been doing for the last 5 years?” Henry stopped himself just in time before the secret he was holding like a poison challis came out. “Look, this isn’t about you and Matthew, it’s about you and me. The question is do you want to be with me?”  
Mary got up from the chaise and stood defiantly in front of Henry with her hands on her hips,  
“Are you going to let me say what I came here to say now?” She laughed.  
Henry was shocked. How could she laugh in his face at a time like this? 

“I was going to thank you for giving me time and space to think about what I really wanted. I was going to say that you’ve been so patient, but now…”  
“Oh god, I’ve blown it haven’t I? I had to say something!”  
“Will you just shut up and listen? Oh hang it all!” Mary couldn’t explain. How could she explain something she barely understood herself? Years ago she had longed for Matthew to return - but now all she longed for was Henry. Now she gave up trying to make sense of everything and pulled Henry’s tie to bring his face close to hers. “I love both of you but …”  
She broke off to kiss him. It took Henry a few seconds to realise that this was not a goodbye kiss and that he was still Mary’s husband. He curled his arms around her and buried his face in her neck and almost sobbed.  
“Oh thank god! I thought I’d lost you. Mary.”  
She hugged him close and stroked his hair,  
“I’m so sorry, my darling, I’m sorry I took so long to realise that you are the one I need now.”  
“But you’re still married to Matthew.”  
“I’m going to ask him for a divorce so we can be married properly. So, Henry Talbot, will you marry me? If you still want to?”  
His smile was impossibly wide,  
“If I still want to?! I’ve never wanted anything so much in my entire life!” Henry recovered himself a little and pressed kisses all over her face and neck, “I love you so much.” 

Mary arched her neck to receive Henry’s kisses and undid his tie.  
“I love you. I’ve missed being with you so much.”  
“What made you decide?”  
He asked as he helped Mary with her buttons.  
“I’ll always love Matthew, but he’s part of a life that doesn’t exist anymore.”

Unlike the last, desperate occasion they had made love, this time it was tender and deliciously unhurried. This time they did not have to rush because they knew they would have the rest of their lives together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mary’s comment to Tom about not knowing whether she would still be married to or in love with Matthew if he’d lived really stuck with me. Mary is in such a different place in her life now. She has become a different woman partly because Matthew died. Would she really want to go back to her ‘old’ life? I don’t think so.
> 
> I didn’t really want to spend time tying up the loose ends of the story but because I am a sucker for a happy ending I think everything would be sorted out in a civilised way - but that’s not so interesting to write about! Matthew and Henry seem quite reasonable men and you can bet that Tom would help it all go smoothly. Matthew and Mary would have had a quiet divorce so he can marry Sylvie. Mary and Henry get married. Robert finally succumbs to another burst ulcer and Matthew would inherit the estate – but the sensible man would see no reason for Mary and Henry to vacate the Abbey because it’s George’s home. I think they would all live at Downton (maybe Tom and Laura too?) – after all it’s big enough! I can imagine the discussion about whether they should all be under one roof -  
> “But the scandal!” Mary would say.  
> “Since when have we been afraid of that?” Tom would laugh.  
> “Grannie will be turning in her grave!”  
> I can imagine them all – the hot topic of gossip in the village and below stairs – living happily together. Mary, Sylvie and Laura producing an endless supply of babies while still working and being general feminist icons. Cora and Isobel being doting grandmothers. Matthew, Henry and Tom being besties and great successes in business. There you go – a happy ending – however unrealistic!


End file.
